Blue Moons Happen

I have a thing.  Any of my close friends or family members would recognize it immediately, because when it shows up, it doesn’t do a great job being discrete.  It makes itself known by twiddling my thumbs, chewing my bottom lip, or flat-out making demands out of my mouth.  It is the thing I have that keeps…

Ode to the Pink Flask

     I have found something wonderful in life.  At first glance it’s a bit silly, and something a little bit sad to identify with.  I have a new flask I got for Christmas, and if I believed (which I do not) that people could somehow exist in inanimate objects, this alcohol-delivering vessel is the thing I’d be. …

Torquemada’s Chair: The Conclusion

     So I did it…I now have two bleeding holes where those pesky wisdom teeth used to live.  It’s difficult to recognize my victory while I examine my cheeks through oxycodone goggles only to notice the resemblance to a chipmunk preparing for a brutal winter (take a moment to sketch this out…it’s amusing).  In the past 72 hours I’ve eaten…

Dog Watching

I learn a lot by watching the behaviors of my two dogs, Scarlet O’Hara and Daisy Duke.  First of all, I must point out that who we really are as humans is very animalistic.   Everything they do, minus the canine “handshake” (for most of us), we are pretty much guilty of doing as well.  The only…